Faced with increasing internal and external forces such as downsizing, businesses are responding by seeking ways to maximize productivity. One way is by cultivating human This book has a balanced amount of exercises, case studies, and application activities which could be enormously beneficial to a mentee in preparing for a mentoring experience.
Some of the activities that may prove beneficial to mentees are:
- Defining a personal reason to be mentored (p. 4)
- Recognition of their own perception of the benefits of mentoring (p. 5)
- Previous mentors who may not have been cloaked in a mentoring label such as teachers or friends (p. 15)
- Previous “assistance” from a person in a time of need (p. 17)
- Exploration of the value of partnerships and potential conflicts (p. 25)
- Analyzing degree of comfort with change (p. 38)
- Responding in ways that do not create defensiveness but do assert the needs of the mentee (p. 54)
- Agreements and expectations (p. 68 and 69)
Most of the activities are intended to be for the mentee’s own self-reflection. However, several of the activities listed above would benefit the mentoring relationship and should therefore be discussed with the mentor. Other activities that could be discussed with mentors are:
- Determination of mentee’s needs or wants (p. 30)
- Useful mentee skills (p. 45)
- Listening skills (p. 48)
- Special note should be taken of the “Trigger Words” (p. 49 #3) exercise and to communicate that information to the mentor
- Learning habits (p. 33) and styles (p. 88)
A few of the exercises in this book would also be beneficial for mentors to go through such as:
- Developing productive questioning techniques (p. 47-49)
- Trust Building (p. 50)
- Statement framed as “I” versus “You” (p. 55)
- The effects of an “advice-method” of mentoring (p. 57)
While the checklists and exercises were beneficial, several contained terms or concepts that were not explained. This lack of explanation renders their inclusion potentially confusing or meaningless. An example of this is on Self Empowerment Checklist(p. 28). This exercise asks the mentee to check those things that would be beneficial to their development with no explanation of what they mean to a mentoring relationship. Some of the items are:
Develop win-win negotiating skills
Strengthen one’s character by study and application
Other items on the Checklist that are clear and unambiguous (i.e., beneficial information to glean) are:
Use a system of ethical exercise and growth
Strengthen communication skills (writing, speaking, and listening)
Seek ways to broaden personal vision and imagination
Still other items on the checklist appear vague and not clearly defined , such as:
Practice team-building skills – bridging people to consensus
Relish and use positive and constructive humor
Another exercise, Evaluating Your Communication Habits (p. 46), requests that the mentee check options for interpersonal communication habits (skills) and indicate how often they are practiced. It may be difficult for a mentee to know whether they are, in fact, communicating clearly. These items may best be discussed with the mentor to allow for an analysis of the “receiver’s” perspective of some of these.
The learning styles exercise (p. 88) is absent resources to understand what these concepts mean. Resources on learning style inventories would be helpful and enhance the intent of this exercise.
Many of the concepts here are similar to those mentioned in other publications such as:
- Benefits of Mentoring especially with respect to the issues of access to power. This “benefit” is also discussed in the Myths and Magic book as taking care that the mentoring relationship does not focus on the newfound access to power and status brought about through the mentor’s connection (p. 11).
- “True mentoring occurs when the participants go above and beyond the mundane activities into something that helps the mentee transcend the ordinary, in a developmental sense.” This was addressed in both Mentor’s Companion and Reflective Practitioner. Decision-making and problem-solving processes are described as the ultimate goal to a mentoring relationship (p. 11).
- Parameters of the expectations and agreements were discussed thoroughly and similarly in Myths and Magic. Of particular interest is the concept of the “no-fault” termination of the mentoring relationship. Each book discusses also clearly defined expectations as well as meeting establishment and attendance(p. 69).
- Like Myths and Magic, Making the Most of Being Mentored points to the need to clarify the protégé/mentee’s goals and expectations. Inappropriate mentee goals -- such as that the mentor will dispense his or her knowledge or provide access to mentoring or promotion -- can create misunderstanding and breakdown of the relationship (p. 77).
A few of the sections are potentially “misplaced” in the book and disrupt the flow. A section on “Type of Mentoring Relationships” (p. 73) and an analysis of learning styles (p. 87) would seem more appropriately placed toward the beginning of the book. A section on becoming an “Assertive Learner” (p. 33) would have flowed seamlessly and more naturally if combined with the section on learning styles.
Case studies and diagrams contribute to the variety this book provides in its attempt to meet a number of learning Approaches. A series of case studies is also presented throughout the book with guided exercises to analyze the study. These provide a way to “observe” an interaction and apply it to the topic discussed. Diagrams assist in meeting the visual learner’s need for accessing information. The Quality of Assistance diagram (p. 16) interestingly lays out the proportionate gain in energy from their own energy and commitment with a mentor’s assistance. Another useful diagram is the benefit to the mentee of the mentoring “investment” (p. 18). This diagram shows graphically that the amount of time spent mentoring is not as important as the quality of that time. Relatively small amounts of “quality” time can prove to be beneficial.
A section on Creating a Flexible Life Plan (p. 35) provides two visual life-plan models. Because interpreting attracts so many second-career individuals, this demonstration may be helpful to both mentors and mentees.
There is a relatively short section related to the value of being mentoring by someone “different” than the mentee. Points are made related to differences in culture, age, and education (p. 25).
The section on internalizing the mentor’s input (p. 59) contains a four-step process which, while intended for mentees, would also benefit mentors in guiding the mentee. Mentors may consider these steps in the wrap-up phase of mentoring meetings and relationships. Of particular importance and possible use is #2 which states that “there tends to be a substantial loss of detail in one to three hours after a learning experience (p. 60).” When developing skill activities, it is vital to be as detailed as possible to ensure clarity at the time the mentee has the time to work.
The book provides guidance on when to know the mentoring relationship has reached an end and what to do (p. 95). It states that when the mentee has “achieved his or her objectives,” the relationship has come to its natural end. However, the analogy used, that of a failed marriage and two people outgrowing each other, leading to divorce, seemed odd.
Most important is the need to celebrate and review the successes of the mentoring. It also states that the mentee should “express appreciation” which implies that the mentor should not. If a mentoring relationship is mutually beneficial, there should be no need for either parties to express this appreciation. While nice, it appears to be a “requirement” as a good way to bring closure. While appreciation is always welcome, to state that it is only a requirement of the mentee lends to the belief that mentoring is more a one-way process.
Finally, the book closes with “Some Points to Remember” (p. 104) that are just that. Mentoring:
• Is an adult-to-adult partnership.
• A voluntary commitment.
• Requires responsibility on the mentor’s and mentee’s part.
• Is not training or an entitlement.
• Carries a no-fault termination at any time.
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